Posts tagged spiders

inlouhazthrusts:

inlouhazthrusts:

inlouhazthrusts:

you guys i opened a door to let the dogs out and a fucking spider ran across my foot inside and then i was screaming and my mom dropped a plastic bowl on it to not let it run away and then it fUCKING GAVE BIRTH ON THE FLOOR IN THE BOWL AND THEN WE WERE BOTH SCREAMING

WHAT DO I DO

ITS STILL IN THE BOWL AND ITS JUST HAVING MORE BABIES

FUCK

IT DROPPED MORE BABIES

MY DADS LIKE GASSING THEM WITH SPRAY AND ITS STILL GIVING BIRTH

YOU GUYS THOSE ARE ALL BABIES

FUCK MY LIFE

Do you see this tumblr? We moved our current refrigerator to prepare for the new one coming tomorrow. This was under it. It could fit in my palm.   THIS WAS IN MY HOUSE TUMBLR. Do you see it’s legs? You can see the hair on them. I’m slightly horrified and request to live in a bubble k thanks

Do you see this tumblr? We moved our current refrigerator to prepare for the new one coming tomorrow. This was under it. It could fit in my palm. THIS WAS IN MY HOUSE TUMBLR. Do you see it’s legs? You can see the hair on them. I’m slightly horrified and request to live in a bubble k thanks

Me: Okay well I really hate killing you guys and I know that without you the world would be overrun with insects, so I love you and all, but I kind of really need to take a shower and I don't wanna drown you or have you panic and bite me.
Spider: No probs bro I'll just go hang around in that corner until you're done. By the way, your fan is getting really dirty, my cousin's been living in there and he's not so happy with the conditions.
Me: Oh that's okay I'll have it cleaned and just you can just tell him to move out until it's done.
Spider: Sure thing, man, I'll be over here until your shower's over.
So here I am minding my own business when I look over at my balcony door and I see this. A mother fucking spider. It hadn’t been there all night. But in the dew of the rising sun, it rose, like a monster from the depths. I promptly squished it with my shoe and left its caracas to rot so that other spiders will see what I did and cower in fear.

Mother fuckers.

Hate mother fuckin spiders.

So here I am minding my own business when I look over at my balcony door and I see this. A mother fucking spider. It hadn’t been there all night. But in the dew of the rising sun, it rose, like a monster from the depths. I promptly squished it with my shoe and left its caracas to rot so that other spiders will see what I did and cower in fear.

Mother fuckers.

Hate mother fuckin spiders.

imthedad:

fact: you eat 28 spiders in your lifetime. always 28. if you are about to die and you have only eaten 3 then 25 spiders arrive at once

Spider fucking was crawling on me. Kid you not. Fucking crawling on me. I killed it via my remote and screaming

Spider fucking was crawling on me. Kid you not. Fucking crawling on me. I killed it via my remote and screaming